Because I can! Petty and Vindictive
(Subtitle 2002: Why I have no reason to regret Him dumping me)
he's already showing signs of losing his hair.
he's almost a year younger than me.
uses stupid words to refer to anatomy.
keeps a gun in his apartment.
never had any qualms expressing his opinion that girls should not be hairy or pierced.
doesn't like Jerry Garcia.
from a long line of bigots.
in total denial over his own issues.
he's almost a year younger than me and he works at the rib place.
his feet smell.
no, really.
has OCD like behaviors.
has mentioned more than once that he 'forgot to eat today' because he was stoned/tired.
looks eerily like my biological grandfather.
narrow musical interests.
talks about this 'girl' at work who's apparently after him, calling her a psycho, but apparently dating her anyway.
owns no utensils.
I saw him eat fast food three times in one day once.
it's obvious when he's trying to be cool.
believes 10 pm is a good time to start hanging out.
unimpressive attitude towards menstruation.
said "nice ass. not fantastic, but nice."
lacks even partial mastery of the art of sarcasm.
needs a new toothbrush. badly.
is capable of speaking his mind for extended periods of time, but saying little. (i gave him a run for his money)
when I told him I'd joined the campus condom club and had to pay for 50 of them at a time, he said, 'it's not my fault you're a tramp.'
he doesn't keep condoms around.
when he doesn't want to be nice, he doesn't even try.
I'm sure there are more, I know there must be. I feel like maybe having this list will help me, so I will probably come back and update it.
Update: Jan 1, 2002
(New Year's Resolutions)
I will not have sex with any man who:
is a bigot
is younger than me (oops, but only once)
doesn't tell me I am beautiful and fabulous/
I have not known for a least a month (one-night stands in foreign countries exempted)
Has a girlfriend or a wife.
Chases tail in my presence.
Isn't concerned with my happiness, pleasure, and well-being (i.e. does not have a problem with me being a "mental patient" and the things like therapy a medication that go along with that)
Doesn't really want me.
Doesn't really respect me.
Doesn't like me1.
That's it for 2002's sexual resolutions. I have done pretty well actually. In between obsessing about the guy I talked to last night and my imaginary brain tumor2, I thought it might be a good idea to put these lists together and see how well I'm doing at preserving some semblance of my dignity.
I made M a tape last night of an album I think he should hear. This is not out of character for me at all. It will be the third tape I've brought someone at that bar, and I haven't slept with any of them.
He teaches at the same university that I do, and I know in which department, so I tormented myself playing Stalker for awhile. I could easily get his email, home phone, office #. . . There are 2 who go by the same first name in that department, but I'm pretty sure he is not the one that got his BA in 1974. He could not necessarily track me down so easily if inclined. There are 4 grads in our department with the same first name.
It's not technically stalking until one actually takes some sort of action, right? Like, oh, so, standing outside his apt at night caterwauling or, em, sending an e-mail composed entirely of an Emily Dickonson poem plus that DSM codes that define me which I shared with him last night.
I think he must have been mighty drunk3. He seemed more forthcoming than usual. Probably a mistake. But I want him to hear this music, so I will wait till next Friday and that is all I can conscionably do.
(Subtitle 2002: Why I have no reason to regret Him dumping me)
he's already showing signs of losing his hair.
he's almost a year younger than me.
uses stupid words to refer to anatomy.
keeps a gun in his apartment.
never had any qualms expressing his opinion that girls should not be hairy or pierced.
doesn't like Jerry Garcia.
from a long line of bigots.
in total denial over his own issues.
he's almost a year younger than me and he works at the rib place.
his feet smell.
no, really.
has OCD like behaviors.
has mentioned more than once that he 'forgot to eat today' because he was stoned/tired.
looks eerily like my biological grandfather.
narrow musical interests.
talks about this 'girl' at work who's apparently after him, calling her a psycho, but apparently dating her anyway.
owns no utensils.
I saw him eat fast food three times in one day once.
it's obvious when he's trying to be cool.
believes 10 pm is a good time to start hanging out.
unimpressive attitude towards menstruation.
said "nice ass. not fantastic, but nice."
lacks even partial mastery of the art of sarcasm.
needs a new toothbrush. badly.
is capable of speaking his mind for extended periods of time, but saying little. (i gave him a run for his money)
when I told him I'd joined the campus condom club and had to pay for 50 of them at a time, he said, 'it's not my fault you're a tramp.'
he doesn't keep condoms around.
when he doesn't want to be nice, he doesn't even try.
I'm sure there are more, I know there must be. I feel like maybe having this list will help me, so I will probably come back and update it.
Update: Jan 1, 2002
(New Year's Resolutions)
I will not have sex with any man who:
is a bigot
is younger than me (oops, but only once)
doesn't tell me I am beautiful and fabulous/
I have not known for a least a month (one-night stands in foreign countries exempted)
Has a girlfriend or a wife.
Chases tail in my presence.
Isn't concerned with my happiness, pleasure, and well-being (i.e. does not have a problem with me being a "mental patient" and the things like therapy a medication that go along with that)
Doesn't really want me.
Doesn't really respect me.
Doesn't like me1.
That's it for 2002's sexual resolutions. I have done pretty well actually. In between obsessing about the guy I talked to last night and my imaginary brain tumor2, I thought it might be a good idea to put these lists together and see how well I'm doing at preserving some semblance of my dignity.
I made M a tape last night of an album I think he should hear. This is not out of character for me at all. It will be the third tape I've brought someone at that bar, and I haven't slept with any of them.
He teaches at the same university that I do, and I know in which department, so I tormented myself playing Stalker for awhile. I could easily get his email, home phone, office #. . . There are 2 who go by the same first name in that department, but I'm pretty sure he is not the one that got his BA in 1974. He could not necessarily track me down so easily if inclined. There are 4 grads in our department with the same first name.
It's not technically stalking until one actually takes some sort of action, right? Like, oh, so, standing outside his apt at night caterwauling or, em, sending an e-mail composed entirely of an Emily Dickonson poem plus that DSM codes that define me which I shared with him last night.
I think he must have been mighty drunk3. He seemed more forthcoming than usual. Probably a mistake. But I want him to hear this music, so I will wait till next Friday and that is all I can conscionably do.
1. A glance at the first list should assure anyone in doubt that the items on the second list do, indeed, tend to be an problem. Perhaps moreso for women with self-esteem issues.
2. I have a proclivity for SNRI-induced imaginary brain tumors.
3. A contextual typo? Judging from the misspellings, and knowing that I was not on any anti-convulsants at this time, it appears I was drunk. When I wrote this. I don't think I'm going to be able to transcribe any entirely undoctored entries beyond the first. Though I could conceivably make things worse, being on topiramate now.
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